How to Get Started with Online Dating

by on January 23, 2012

Nowadays, there is a great deal of buzz surrounding online dating. From television commercials to online advertisements, online dating websites make it a point to be known. The truth is online dating can be a great way to meet people that share similar interests, goals, and views. On the other hand, online dating can be overwhelming if you are not prepared for it. If you are thinking of giving online dating a try, you should keep the following online dating advice in mind.

Determine Your Needs

Before you can get started in the world of online dating, you should determine your needs. Since so many different online dating sites exist, you should figure out what type to join. If you are a devout Christian, perhaps you should consider joining a Christian-based dating site. This will prevent you from responding to people who may not share your views, which can often prove to be a waste of time. Instead, it is best to join an online dating site that is specifically for people like you. By doing this, you will be certain that you are responding to members that may be legitimate matches. It is good to know that there are online dating sites for almost every type of person out there, so you should be able to find some that suit your needs.

Research Your Options

Once you have figured out what your needs are in regards to the type of dating site you should join, you can begin to research your options. Check out all of the sites that appeal to you. Read and understand the details of each, and find out what costs are associated with them as well. By familiarizing yourself with the dating procedures of different sites, you will be able to choose one (or a few) that sound like your cup of tea. It is also a good idea to research the reviews of any potential sites. This will give you an idea of what people really think about them, and may help you make a decision as to what site(s) to join.

Always Be Yourself

After you have researched your options and joined a site or two, you should always remember to be yourself. When you are making your profile, list everything that is important to you, as well as your true interests and beliefs. Also, make it clear if there are certain things you do not like in a person. You certainly do not want to pretend to be something you are not. If people see how you really are, you will be much more likely to find someone you are truly compatible with. Although you want people to see the true you, keep in mind that you should not disclose deeply personal information on any dating site.

Stay Open-Minded

If you go into online dating with an open mind, you will be much more likely to have a good experience with it. Do not expect to find that special person right away. It may take some time to find someone who you really relate with. Additionally, do not turn someone away if they are not exactly like you. There are many happy couples in this world who have learned to accept each other’s differences. Keep in mind that you may have to join more than one site to have success as well. Just because you join one online dating site doesn’t mean you will find your soul mate there.

 

Be Safe

Online dating scams are becoming more commonplace. You may have heard tales about women who were duped out of money or tricked in some other way. These things actually happen. As with traditional dating, you must take precautions while dating online. Take time to get to know someone before meeting them and then meet them in a public place. Do not give out your address or other personal information to someone you’ve just met. Finally, be cautious if someone asks you for money, requests gifts, or tries to get you to assist them with a financial problem. They may be a skilled con artist, not a potential mate.

Get Out There

These tips should help you get started in the online dating world. Always remember that safety is number one, so never give out personal information to someone you have just met. You might think that they are wonderful, but you cannot know that for sure. Also, try to make online dating a fun experience. Staying positive will really help you along the way. Lastly, do not give up. Just as in real life, it may take a while to meet that special someone.

Guest post from Jaime Castle. Jamie writes about dating and dating sites for OnlineDating.org.

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Things You Shouldn’t Bring Up On A First Date

by on January 18, 2012

What’s the similarity between that crazy uncle that every family has, your ex, and your deep, dirty secret that you keep hidden have in common? They’re just three out of several topics you should avoid bringing up on a first date.

People tell me that I tend to be an open book, however when it comes to a first date, I try not to share too much. (Of course, priorities change, if I’m drinking.) While it’s possible to say the wrong things and still have a successful first date, you’ll want to avoid some of these first date conversations/statements, so that you can secure that second date.

“Financially, I’m doing great/awful.”
People tend to draw conclusions based off the income/wealth/economic status of others, so if you want to be evaluated for who you are as a person – your ambitions, personality, interests – then you’ll want to avoid discussing your income generating potential.

“My last relationship ended in disaster.”
You’ll want to try and stay away from relationship discussions that deal with the awful divorce you’re going through or the nasty break up with your last ex. There’s no point in bringing up sad topics on a first date, so you’ll want to avoid  talking about your problems. Emotional baggage can make the person you’re on a date with run for the hills, even if you are a perfect match in every other manner. After you’ve been on a couple of dates with each other and have established a romantic connection, then you can divulge your relationship past if it comes up.

“Life just isn’t working out for me right now.”
Confidence is an attractive quality that tends to draw people in. It’s okay if your life isn’t where you want it to be; whether you want to get a better job, a nice place, lose weight, or any number of things, so long as you are proud and confident in yourself. The last thing you want to do on a first date is apologize for where you are in your life journey or to express your dissatisfaction with your life.

“I did want to tell you a dirty little secret…”
You don’t want to divulge information about yourself that’s too personal unless the other person brings it up first and even then you want to tread with some caution. Feel free to let them divulge their secrets while you try to steer clear of letting anything too private slip. There’s no sense in discussing sensitive information about yourself with someone who you may never see again. If you go out on additional dates then you can slowly talk about those more private matters in your life.

“So I just got out of rehab.”
Perhaps you have a couple of personal problems you’ve been working on or maybe you’ve been in therapy since you’ve been a child. Whatever the case is, it’s best not to introduce your life drama and the big issues in it to your new romantic interest. Everyone has some issues in their life, whether they be big or small, but the first date is the time to show case your personality, and not come off as an addict (even if you are one).

“Who are you voting for?”
In the south, there’s a saying about not bringing up politics or religion in polite company. There are plenty of couples who don’t see eye-to-eye when it comes to political or religious views but are still able to be in happy relationships with each other. However, when trying to make a good impression on a first date, it’s best to avoid overly emotional topics that can lead to sparring matches. Remember, if you become a couple then you’ll have plenty of time to get into fights later on down the road.

“Can you pay the check? I’m broke.”
Hey, we all know the economy is in the toilet. You’re broke, I’m broke, we’re all broke. However, common courtesy dictates that the person who did the asking of the date be the one to offer to pay the bill. Let’s face it, times have changed and it’s no longer viewed as it being the guy’s responsibility automatically to pay the bill. That being said, you should never, flat out ask your date to pay the bill as it’s a major turn-off. Additionally, you should avoid using coupons for the first date. It’s great that your internet savvy and able to find a great deal on Yelp or GroupOn, however avoid looking like a cheap-o who picked a restaurant based off its savings. You can save the coupons for your second date.

Check out an additional 50 things you shouldn’t say, or even think about, on a first date.

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